Chronicles of an Endurance Athlete's Wife

Married to an Ultra Runner

Living in a Pipe Dream

I started this blog a few years ago when my husband’s goal to become a professional athlete seemed like a pipe dream.  We were young and poor, nomadic and impulsive (myself more than him.)  We slept on a mattress on the floor, ate beans and rice everyday and lived in a run down house across from a baseball field that moonlighted as an open air saloon for the homeless. We had a little girl, and were just trying to figure out how we wanted to build our lives as a family.

When I started writing here, I was still struggling to find myself amidst the chaos of new motherhood.  As most parents know, it is hard to maintain a clear determination of who we are when most of the day is spent mindlessly (yet lovingly?) cooking, cleaning, tending to/and or ignoring shrill cries, playing pretend, being a taxi driver and making sure everyone is moderately happy.  (Over the years and subsequent children, my standard for childhood happiness has gone from “make every day the best day ever” to “did everyone get fed today?”)

We were married young, (22 and 24 years old) and luckily, we grew up together rather than apart.  My husband toyed with a lot of career ideas in the beginning; chef, singer-songwriter, medical doctor (yes, he really has all of those talents) but he always came back to running, as far-fetched a dream as it seemed to actually “make it” as an athlete.

But, as I mentioned, we were young, poor and didn’t have much to lose, and so we decided to go for it.  Of course, over the past 3 years my husband went to school to get his doctorate in Physical Therapy as a back-up plan.  People still laugh when he says that his degree is a second option, but believe me, he isn’t kidding.

The other day, an acquaintance asked my husband about his running career, and what “the dream” was for him.  “I’m living it,” he responded without an ounce of irony or facetiousness.

The acquaintance looked around our humble home that boasts a Play Doh caked carpet, mud-streaked windows and doorless kitchen cupboards (not the trendy kind, the kind that results from a 2 years long paint job saga that we haven’t cared about enough to finish.)

He could probably see the goats grazing around our wild forest/barn hybrid backyard,  with a fence-hopping neighbor chicken or two pecking around to see if the insects were better in our yard.  He likely noticed the artful toddler penmanship on the couch he sat on, or the myriad scuffs on the worn entryway dresser we thrifted from a garage sale.

We could tell he was searching for an appropriate response, one that would mar the surprised look on his face.  “Awesome!” he said, then quickly changed the subject.

When people think of professional athletes, they think of the Mayweathers (respect) and LeBrons.  But running is not boxing or basketball.  There isn’t millions to be made in the sport.  People do it because they just straight up love it, even if they know they’ll never be rolling in Bentleys and makin’ it rain with Benjamins.

Although I wouldn’t call myself a runner by any means (but I have grown to really love trail running over the past few months), the years of being an endurance runner’s wife have taught me that running is more than just a sport.

To the true lovers, running is an emotional outlet, a therapist, a means of constructive masochism, a way to moderate (or facilitate) extremism, and a socially acceptable way to hermit while allowing lone wolves to find like-minded friends all rolled into one activity.

Yes, we would likely be rolling a little deeper if my husband had decided to become an MD and I had pursued a writing career right off the bat, but at what cost?

The truth is, we are living the dream.  Our dream.  My husband is able to make a living doing what he loves, working on a daily basis with more grit and self-motivation than most people can find in a lifetime. That in itself is a dream we try not to take for granted.

I’m able to stay home with my three young girls, which I see as an absolute privilege.  I get to invest time in writing, even if it brings in 0$ , so that when I’m ready to pry my loving motherly death grip from my children (or when they’re all in school, or when they tell me they’ve been sufficiently smothered) I can continue my dream career as a writer.

Sure, our house is modest, our car is old and we don’t have some of the luxuries associated with The American Dream.  But we are doing what we love to do, and getting by at the same time.

We’ve come a long way from where we started as a couple of kids trying to make sense of adulting.  We’ve learned that often, happiness is born from struggle.  We’ve discovered ourselves, both individually and collectively, through really hard times.  We’ve stumbled and built ourselves back up more times than we can recount, but each time we emerge just a little bit wiser, and a little bit stronger.

Most importantly, we’ve learned that there is no dream without hardship.

I guess my point in writing this is to say that “the dream” is relative.  “Making it” is also relative, and as long as you feel fulfilled, happy and accomplished doing what you do, that IS the dream.

I know I’ve said this before, but as I grow up, I realize the importance of staying true to what I believe and honoring what resonates to my core, regardless of what others think.

If makin’ it rain is what resonates, power to you.  If being a struggling artist makes you tick, go for it.

At the end of the day, we’re all just trying to make sense of adulting in our own ways, and I’ll likely still be trying to figure it out when I’m old and grey.

 

75 Comments

  1. Just what I needed to “hear”. Your words are so eloquently spoken. I am essentially a stay at home mother who serves on occasion to help out monetarily and to keep my sanity. I have a college degree, wonderful husband, 2 sweet boys, a house and lots of love. Many of my friends and family are considered “professionals” and I often find my self feeling insecure in their company. But when I sit quietly I am reminded that I AM LIVING MY DREAM. And those around me love me for me!! Thank you for reminding me, I needed that. 🙏 Much gratitude

  2. Justin Schlosser

    August 30, 2017 at 11:13 am

    I love this so much! I am a stay at home father who supports his wife in her career. Your words gave me great perspective and comfort. You’re a boss.

  3. Keep a writin’ and smothering those babes. Time flys waaaaay too fast. They will be 18 before you know it and you will be looking back on all you did to get them there. I am fortunate to be fulfulled and pleased with how I raised them, how I was “there”. That joy and satisfaction is priceless. I can’t imagine how hollow I would feel now if I weren’t “there”. “There” doesnt always mean physically. …ive learned that too as a working mom, and seeing stay at home moms that werent “there” with their kids….that’s a whole nuther topic. You are there physically and “there” ..in the moment with your kids, experiencing and loving them right there in their moments not yours. That’s what I mean by “there”. Blah blah blah…

  4. Awaiting moderation

    Terrific forum posts. With thanks!
    https://www.viagrawithoutadoctorsmim.com/
    cost of cialis vs viagra
    buy viagra online
    does viagra effect eye site
    buy viagra online

  5. Awaiting moderation

    You have made your point.
    https://www.viagrawithoutadoctorsmim.com/
    cheap prices for viagra
    generic viagra
    find viagra free sites
    generic viagra 100mg

  6. Awaiting moderation

    Excellent knowledge. Thanks a lot.
    https://www.viagrawithoutdoctorbnt.com/
    viagra poems
    viagra without a doctors prescription
    kamagra or vega viagra
    viagra generic

  7. Awaiting moderation

    You actually expressed this superbly!
    https://www.viagrawithoutdoctorntx.com/
    steroids and viagra
    buy viagra
    lawsuit pertaining to viagra
    buy viagra

  8. Awaiting moderation

    Many thanks, Quite a lot of material.

    https://www.viagrawithoutdoctormsn.com/
    generic viagra dose reviews
    generic viagra
    viagra nitrite
    viagra without a doctors prescription

  9. Awaiting moderation

    You said it adequately..
    https://www.genericviagracubarx.com/
    mapuche viagra
    generic viagra 100mg
    viagra use reports
    generic viagra

  10. Awaiting moderation

    Thanks a lot! Plenty of stuff.

    https://www.viagrawithoutadoctorsmim.com/
    viagra hydrocodone vicoden
    generic viagra 100mg
    viagra and online pharmacy
    generic viagra online

  11. Awaiting moderation

    Regards! Lots of postings!

    https://www.viagrawithoutadoctorsmim.com/
    suppliers of viagra
    buy viagra online
    generic viagra verses brand viagra
    viagra 100mg

  12. Awaiting moderation

    Info well applied!.
    https://www.genericviagracubarx.com/
    women and viagra
    viagra 100mg
    viagra no prescription
    viagra for women

  13. Awaiting moderation

    Thank you! I appreciate it.
    https://www.viagrawithoutdoctorntx.com/
    mix regalis and viagra
    generic viagra 100mg
    do porn stars use viagra
    generic viagra

  14. Awaiting moderation

    You actually stated it effectively!
    https://www.genericviagracubarx.com/
    viagra sheet off leg
    generic viagra 100mg
    find viagra edinburgh pages search charles
    cheap viagra

  15. Awaiting moderation

    Nicely put. Regards.
    https://www.viagrawithoutdoctorntx.com/
    viagra herpes
    cheap viagra
    viagra meets the rave scene
    generic viagra 100mg

  16. Awaiting moderation

    You revealed this really well!
    https://www.viagrawithoutdoctorntx.com/
    australia viagra how much
    viagra pills
    research cost of viagra
    generic viagra

  17. Awaiting moderation

    Thank you. I appreciate it!
    https://www.genericviagracubarx.com/
    viagra generic now
    generic viagra 100mg
    viagra home office photo
    buy viagra

  18. Awaiting moderation

    This is nicely put! .
    https://www.viagrawithoutadoctorsmim.com/
    finasteride viagra
    viagra online
    female ingestion of viagra
    cheap viagra

  19. Awaiting moderation

    You actually stated it exceptionally well.
    https://www.viagrawithoutdoctorbnt.com/
    bayer viagra sales
    viagra without a doctors prescription
    cuba gooding viagra commercial
    viagra for sale uk

  20. Awaiting moderation

    Thanks. I like it!
    https://www.genericviagracubarx.com/
    free coupons viagra
    generic viagra online
    cialis dysfunction erectile levitra viagra
    buy viagra online

  21. Awaiting moderation

    Info very well applied.!
    https://www.viagrawithoutdoctormsn.com/
    3 viagra dosage
    viagra without a doctor prescription
    viagra spokespersons
    viagra for sale uk

  22. Awaiting moderation

    Seriously plenty of very good advice!
    https://www.viagrawithoutdoctormsn.com/
    can someone on amiloride take viagra
    generic viagra online
    what works in synergy with viagra
    generic viagra 100mg

  23. Awaiting moderation

    You actually revealed it adequately.
    https://www.viagrawithoutadoctorsmim.com/
    when was viagra released
    cheap viagra
    viagra under the tongue
    generic viagra

  24. Awaiting moderation

    You said it nicely.!
    https://www.viagrawithoutdoctormsn.com/
    generic viagra on sale
    buy viagra online
    free online viagra
    generic viagra 100mg

  25. Awaiting moderation

    Seriously lots of amazing material!
    https://www.viagrawithoutdoctormsn.com/
    mark martin viagra jacket
    viagra pills
    cfids viagra
    viagra 100mg

  26. Awaiting moderation

    You said it nicely..
    https://www.viagrawithoutadoctorsmim.com/
    buy viagra levitra alternative lavitra
    generic viagra 100mg
    tranny taking viagra
    viagra online

  27. Awaiting moderation

    Wonderful data, Thank you!
    https://www.viagrawithoutdoctormsn.com/
    vardenafil viagra cialis
    buy viagra online
    viagra placard
    viagra without a doctors prescription

  28. Awaiting moderation

    Kudos. Ample material.

    https://www.genericviagracubarx.com/
    viagra for sale without a prescription
    generic viagra 100mg
    liver problems and viagra
    viagra without a doctor prescription

  29. Awaiting moderation

    Perfectly expressed really! !
    https://www.viagrawithoutdoctorntx.com/
    viagra uk cheap purchase buy
    generic viagra 100mg
    viagra falls pete hart
    generic viagra 100mg

  30. Awaiting moderation

    Incredible all kinds of great tips.
    https://www.genericviagracubarx.com/
    viagra on women
    viagra for sale uk
    vicoden morphine viagra
    viagra generic

  31. Awaiting moderation

    You expressed it terrifically.
    https://www.genericviagracubarx.com/
    effect viagra vision
    generic viagra
    does medicaid cover viagra
    generic viagra 100mg

  32. Awaiting moderation

    You made the point!
    https://www.viagrawithoutdoctorntx.com/
    viagra discount
    generic viagra 100mg
    order viagra cheap
    buy generic viagra

  33. Awaiting moderation

    Thanks a lot! I value it.
    https://www.viagrawithoutdoctorbnt.com/
    viagra after dinner
    viagra for sale uk
    viagra works best erectile
    buy generic viagra

  34. Awaiting moderation

    Beneficial facts. With thanks.
    https://www.genericviagracubarx.com/
    viagra hurt women
    cheap viagra
    viagra ciudad del carmen
    viagra without a doctors prescription

  35. Awaiting moderation

    Wow plenty of very good advice.
    https://www.viagrawithoutadoctorsmim.com/
    viagra 24 hour delivery uk
    viagra for sale uk
    viagra news edinburgh tid moo
    viagra without a doctors prescription

  36. Awaiting moderation

    Wonderful data. Thanks!
    https://www.viagrawithoutdoctormsn.com/
    subaction showcomments viagra archive older
    viagra online
    greg lang viagra cincinnati health department
    viagra pills

  37. Awaiting moderation

    Good stuff. Thanks.
    https://www.viagrawithoutdoctorntx.com/
    viagra fail drug test
    cheap viagra
    viagra sweat pass out
    generic viagra online

  38. Awaiting moderation

    Many thanks! A lot of write ups!

    https://www.genericviagracubarx.com/
    deep coitus viagra photo galleries
    generic viagra online
    natural alternatives and viagra
    viagra 100mg

  39. Awaiting moderation

    You expressed it exceptionally well.
    https://www.genericviagracubarx.com/
    viagra losing effectiveness
    cheap viagra
    math and viagra
    viagra generic

  40. Awaiting moderation

    With thanks! Quite a lot of tips!

    https://www.viagrawithoutdoctorntx.com/
    genic viagra from india
    viagra without a doctors prescription
    does viagra work for premature ejaculation
    viagra pills

  41. Awaiting moderation

    Very well voiced without a doubt! !
    https://www.viagrawithoutdoctormsn.com/
    viagra cialis delivery
    viagra for women
    redtube viagra
    viagra for women

  42. Awaiting moderation

    You actually revealed it well.
    https://www.viagrawithoutdoctorntx.com/
    force feed viagra
    viagra 100mg
    saturday night live viagra skit
    buy viagra

  43. Awaiting moderation

    This is nicely put. !
    https://www.viagrawithoutdoctorntx.com/
    minister viagra
    buy generic viagra
    teenney transplant and viagra
    viagra online

  44. Awaiting moderation

    Nicely put, With thanks!
    https://www.genericviagracubarx.com/
    viagra tricks
    viagra online
    shelf life and viagra
    buy generic viagra

  45. Awaiting moderation

    Excellent info. With thanks!
    https://www.viagrawithoutdoctorbnt.com/
    genuine viagra
    viagra pills
    viagra viagra edinburgh search cialis charles
    viagra online

  46. Awaiting moderation

    You suggested it wonderfully.
    https://www.viagrawithoutadoctorsmim.com/
    viagra drug store best buys
    viagra without a doctor prescription
    will hydrochlorothiazide affect viagra
    viagra generic

  47. Awaiting moderation

    This is nicely put. !
    https://www.genericviagracubarx.com/
    viagra and flomax
    viagra pills
    viagra makes you blind
    buy viagra online

  48. Awaiting moderation

    With thanks, Useful stuff.
    https://www.viagrawithoutdoctorntx.com/
    natural viagra kava kava
    viagra for women
    kamagra viagra sildenafil
    buy viagra online

  49. Awaiting moderation

    With thanks, Loads of facts.

    https://www.genericviagracubarx.com/
    is generic viagra real
    generic viagra 100mg
    buying viagra using paypal
    viagra without a doctor prescription

  50. Awaiting moderation

    Perfectly expressed truly. !
    https://www.viagrawithoutdoctormsn.com/
    buy viagra $8 per pill
    generic viagra online
    viagra dangers
    viagra for women

  51. Awaiting moderation

    Terrific forum posts. Thanks a lot.
    https://www.viagrawithoutdoctorbnt.com/
    generic viagra caverta caverta pillshoprxcom
    generic viagra 100mg
    viagra delivered from uk pharmacy
    viagra 100mg

  52. Awaiting moderation

    Nicely put, Thank you!
    https://www.viagrawithoutdoctorbnt.com/
    bid 2836 viagra
    viagra for sale uk
    viagra mastercard
    buy viagra

  53. Awaiting moderation

    Thanks. Ample postings.

    https://www.viagrawithoutadoctorsmim.com/
    lowest dose viagra
    viagra without a doctors prescription
    on line viagra reality
    generic viagra 100mg

  54. Awaiting moderation

    Good posts, Kudos.
    https://www.genericviagracubarx.com/
    viagra sex domination
    generic viagra online
    alternative for viagra
    viagra for sale uk

  55. Awaiting moderation

    Many thanks! Ample info!

    https://www.viagrawithoutdoctorntx.com/
    edu forum viagra
    viagra for sale uk
    can a man take womens viagra
    generic viagra 100mg

  56. Awaiting moderation

    You actually explained it superbly.
    https://www.viagrawithoutadoctorsmim.com/
    just 1 viagra
    viagra 100mg
    viagra on sale
    buy viagra online

  57. Awaiting moderation

    You explained this effectively!
    https://www.viagrawithoutdoctormsn.com/
    how long effects viagra
    generic viagra
    viagra discount code
    viagra without a doctor prescription

  58. Awaiting moderation

    You mentioned it perfectly!
    https://www.viagrawithoutdoctorbnt.com/
    free viagra program
    buy viagra
    viagra us
    generic viagra 100mg

  59. Awaiting moderation

    Nicely put, Thanks a lot.
    https://www.viagrawithoutdoctorbnt.com/
    interaction between eutirox and viagra
    viagra without a doctors prescription
    viagra and brain tumors
    viagra for sale uk

  60. Awaiting moderation

    Cheers! I value it!
    https://www.genericviagracubarx.com/
    viagra cialis soft cheap
    viagra for women
    grneric viagra
    generic viagra 100mg

  61. Awaiting moderation

    Whoa lots of great data.
    https://www.viagrawithoutdoctorntx.com/
    cheap pill viagra
    viagra without a doctor prescription
    viagra softtabs fast
    viagra 100mg

  62. Awaiting moderation

    Thanks! Plenty of data!

    https://www.viagrawithoutdoctorntx.com/
    buy viagra overnight
    viagra without a doctors prescription
    can i break a viagra
    viagra pills

  63. Awaiting moderation

    Regards. Terrific stuff!
    https://www.viagrawithoutdoctormsn.com/
    sex after taking viagra
    cheap viagra
    viagra side effect interaction
    viagra without a doctors prescription

  64. Awaiting moderation

    Terrific data. Regards!
    https://www.viagrawithoutdoctormsn.com/
    viagra generic uk
    viagra for sale uk
    edinburgh news viagra search comment
    generic viagra 100mg

  65. Awaiting moderation

    Whoa all kinds of helpful tips!
    https://www.genericviagracubarx.com/
    buying viagra online from canada
    viagra for sale uk
    high blood pressure viagra
    viagra generic

  66. Awaiting moderation

    You explained that wonderfully!
    https://www.viagrawithoutdoctorntx.com/
    arginine natural viagra
    viagra 100mg
    generic viagra online without prescription
    viagra for women

  67. Awaiting moderation

    Terrific data. Regards!
    http://viagrawithoutadoctorsntx.com/
    viagra users reviews
    buy viagra
    took viagra now what
    generic viagra online

  68. Awaiting moderation

    Nicely put. Thanks.
    http://viagrawithoutadoctorsntx.com/
    viagra with out a perscription
    viagra online
    expiration date of viagra patent
    viagra generic

  69. Awaiting moderation

    Nicely put, Kudos.
    http://viagrawithoutadoctormsn.com/
    female viagra and antidepressants
    viagra for women
    blue pill not viagra
    buy viagra

  70. Awaiting moderation

    Regards! Very good information!
    http://viagrapego.com/
    viagra k pes
    generic viagra
    drink female viagra
    viagra for women

  71. Awaiting moderation

    Terrific facts. Cheers!
    http://viagrawithoutadoctorsntx.com/
    lanjin viagra
    viagra online
    viagra for recreational use younger men
    viagra without a doctor prescription

  72. Awaiting moderation

    Lovely material. Many thanks!
    http://viagrapego.com/
    barry bonds viagra
    viagra without a doctor prescription
    how does viagra cause blindness
    viagra for women

  73. Awaiting moderation

    Truly tons of fantastic knowledge.
    http://viagrawithoutadoctorsntx.com/
    va viagra
    generic viagra online
    viagra manchester po box
    cheap viagra

  74. Awaiting moderation

    Nicely put. Thanks a lot.
    http://viagrawithoutadoctormsn.com/
    viagra on line order
    viagra 100mg
    hur l nge h ller viagra
    generic viagra 100mg

  75. Awaiting moderation

    You actually stated it terrifically.
    http://viagrawithoutadoctorsntx.com/
    generic viagra caverta cialis cheap
    viagra for sale uk
    supplier uk viagra
    cheap viagra

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.

*